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No Ammo Left
Rating:
68.18
Perspectives: 3
Votes: 22
ToxicKlay's Avatar
Posted by: ToxicKlay
2007-07-31 07:49:45
Style: Thriller/Horror
Number of pages: 11
Read      Review
No Ammo Left
 
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Perspective Reward Points: 354
Carousel Reward Points: 60
Log Line:
Finish the fight!

The sequel to No Ammo Left
Production Notes:
It took 5 days to do. Its only 11 pages, but its really nice (I think, anyway)
Read and give your perspective on it please!
Latest Perspective on No Ammo Left
LazyPint's Avatar
Posted by: LazyPint
2008-01-10 17:52:57
Not Bad
Overall:
62
Concept: 15
Characters: 12
Dialogue: 13
Presentation: 10
Plot: 12
A few mistakes with tenses and the start on the bridge is rather reminiscent of Resident Evil 2.

I also don't think Jill would carry a lockpick and I'm not sure why they went to find a first aid kit when they knew what was going to happen to Mark. Knocking a head off with a kick is unlikely to happen as well.

Maybe try revising it, add more description and characterisation. It was pretty exciting however, and better than the first one.
Fourth Perspective :: Viewing - ShortStories - No Ammo Left